Dear Cosmos,
Now that I'm 30, I know that...
...I'll never achieve the 6-continents-before-30 dream
...I'll never be that skinny bastard that I want to become
...I'll probably never be a lawyer like I always said I would be
...I'll turn 40 before I even know it
...I'll never have the excuse of youth for being stupid
...I'll never be that "hot new thing" ever again (whatever that means)
However, I also know that
...I've been on 4 continents and that's more than most people
...I've been eating anything I want and I'm still not fat
...I've built a comfortable life for myself without having to become a lawyer
...I've grown so much in the last 10 years, I'm excited to see what I'll be in the next 10
...I've never been stupid anyway, so why care?
...I've gained enough credence to mentor the upcoming "hot new things" (whatever that means)
I thought that I'd freak out when I become 30 but looking back, I've realized how much I've seen, learned and experienced. At first thought 10 years may seem like a blur but if I really think about it, 10 years didn't exactly just fly by. In those 10 years, I went from student, to board exam reviewee, to promdi-yuppie, to miserable banker until I finally became a happy Shell man (seriously, one of the best decisions I've made ever!). The friends I've made and the fiends I've met make up the best decade of my life so far. Now that I'm 30, I'm looking forward to finally losing that last bit of insecurity that I still have, to learn to be more generous, to become more positive, to be slower to anger, to be more patient and to become someone better than who I was during my 20s.
So I want to say thank you to my parents for putting a good head on my shoulders, to my younger sis and bro who never followed my orders (gave me an early sense that I cannot always have my way in the world), to my teachers (for making me realize what I want to become when I grow old) to my friends (high school friends for letting me learn early on how to have fun and not just not hit the books, college friends for letting me find in you my kindred spirits, and Shell friends for never making me feel like an outsider despite my being one in so many ways).
And thank you God for everything - for giving me just enough smarts, just enough looks and just enough talent. And I pray that one day, I will get to use these enough to make a positive dent in this world.
Truly yours,
Paul Angelo
